We both are exhausted cause of this long distance relationship.
I know it's hard for both of us. It's hard on me, I know it's even harder on his side.
I know it took him along time to decide this. I know it. He must had think how bad and how sad I will.
But I guess, at the end he's still the selfish Edrick that I know from the very first day we met.
He choose to end this.
It hurt me but I know, it hurt him more.
The very one last thing that I know about him is, he doesn't like to see me being hurt. I know very well, he loves me very much.
Relationship stress him very much, I know. He can's concentrate on his studies and I don't want that.
It's always been my concern. And finally he said it out himself.
I am glad that he knows what's best for him. :) I am happy for him.
I love him very much too, and I myself am selfish too. I wish we could still continue with this relationship.
But if it'll be better for him by ending this, I am willing to do so.
At least, this is the very one last thing I can do for him, the man that I love very much.
I know, it's gonna be hard for me to love again. It will. And I don't think I can love this much anymore.
The day I fall for him, is the day where I gave all my heart for him, it's close for him.
It'll took months and years to mend this broken heart, because heart that's being broke twice is not heart that can be easily mend. I just can't believe myself, even after being hurt I still care and still love just like before. What a fool I am.
But I know, by ending this it'll be better for him. He could finally hang out with his friends without any hard feelings because of having girlfriend. He could concentrate on studies,without have to bother replying my text and waking up for skype. He can do what-ever things he wishes to do that can't be done because of this relationship status that hinders him. I am glad because of that.
I am moving on, but my heart is not moving on. My person, will move on, because time never stops and I hope as time goes by, this broken heart will be completely mend, by leaving a clear surface and scar within.
I may fall in love again, this is for sure. But I know I won't love this much anymore. Because once it's gone with him, it's gone forever.
Next time if I really found someone who loves me, I will appreciate him. I won't hurt him. But I can't promise to love him as much as I love Edrick.
Thanks to him, thank you that he came to my life once again. He makes me realize what a wonderful person I am. He makes me see I am beyond what I think I am. And he let me know that someone who loves me very much, does exist in this world, it's him.
I thank him for all the memories that he gave me, it was such a wonderful things to keep.
And I thanks God that I found him.
Deep down in me, I hope that time and distance and God will once again, find us in the future.
And I hope next time, will be the right time, right place and the right person,him.
But if we can't, I pray for his best and I pray for he will find someone who loves him that won't hurt him, because his heart is sensitive and fragile,very fragile.
I love you, Edrick Reinaldo Wijaya.
0 comments:
Post a Comment